Week 1

I've been home for a total of three days, and it makes me realize just how blessed I am. Seriously, I walked my dog this afternoon, and was blown away by the beauty in our side yard. Let's just say there was a bunny, a few robins, and a cardinal all frolicking together. It was like Tweety was peeing in the 100 acre woods, and it was great. Since Monday I've unpacked my clothes in record time, donated half of my old wardrobe, enjoyed many a long walk with Tweety, finalized my internship plans (Praises!), and gotten my zen on.

This summer is seriously promising, and I can see that my prayers are already being answered in tangible ways. Before leaving Athens, I asked the Lord for a spirit of productivity and discipline--and I can see this already coming into fruition. Nothing has been getting me down, and I can't wait to walk more in this
"get-it-done" spirit.

Now, I realize that this blog is very journal-y, but that is what I want it to be, I think. I can tell that my heart is already changing, but in ways different than I thought. Today, was my first day since being home that I was  able to have extended quiet/prayer time. The Lord is so, so refreshing, and that's what today's time provided--restoration. I was, however, guilty that I had not fulfilled my plans, and though I was busy, and found it hard to piece two consecutive hours together to pray. I had been feeling like I was backing out on my commitment, and started to resent this goal I had set for myself. Since these feelings occurred at the beginning of my "journey," however, I found it maybe easier to "reshape" what I thought my plans would entail.

What I realized: the Lord meets you where you are always, and more than anything is pursuing a relationship with you. When you spend time with your best friend, do you do it out of obligation? No, you do it because you want to, and the time spent is life-giving and joyful.

I want my desire with my time spent with the Lord to mirror the joy you get from hanging out with your gal pals. I've realized now that two hours is really an arbitrary number, and while great in all, I don't want to put any limits on the time I spend with the Lord. Friendships are much more organic than scheduled "Jesus" appointments, and that is what I want to encounter with the Lord this summer.

He has no limits, or confines, and so I am not going let self-imposed burdens on myself.

Additionally, I've learned that expectation can be really enslaving. When you establish plans for yourself, and then fail to measure up: you feel condemned. And if even if y'all succeed, you still might feel trapped by the pressure of your plans.

I'm becoming more and more content with having faith and hope in God's plans for my life and on the day-to-day. If you (I) keep my heart and soul open, His work can produce things that I can't even imagine. Literally.

God is so good, and I have so much love for y'all.